15 Reasons Why…

1. that other 20% you went out for left you hungry for the 80% you already had.

2. That extra credit took more of you than any lecture could ever give

3. Now I’m working on a new way to avoid to the heartache of being happy without you

4. Learning a new technique can interfere with how you feel about everything so far.

5. From strangers talking about socks to lovers to friends who still talks about socks, you the one I’ll never let go.

6. I wanna give you all my heart but when somebody has yours then I’ll be left empty

7. Don’t tell me how you miss the laughter curse.

8. Trusting my lonely was the best thing I ever done.

9. Taking my joy away was one thing, but giving me something I never asked for and having to take that away killed me more.

10. Nothing kills me more than finding out that my touch will be replaced by someone who ain’t truly care.

11. Thank you, nice try.

12. When you want your chance, step up to the plate and show me your hitter.

13. Because as many times I’ve been the pitcher, I’m getting tired.

14. You just don’t get it.

15. Whenever I think I’m 5 steps up, you knock me back 3 because you think it’s no space for me.

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Trial period

Speak your piece

I’m just checking on my mental

Hopefully you’ll understand

I barely talk to my kinfolk

I was hoping you would be better

It’s still hard to decipher

Whether I win or lose

You’ll never say “ oh I’ll wife her “

It’s a honest trial period

I’m a difficult masterpiece

Free month of whatever

Let’s just try to move forward

I’ve learned to live alone

Doesn’t mean I’m lonely

Look what you made you do

Terrified of loving again

The shit frightens me honestly

Already put it out there once.

Who decides whether it’s real

I wanna love but don’t you tell me first.

I’ll get scared and push you away.

I’m not ready

I’m ready for you to gaze at me like I’m your only one.

But not too much. My insecurities will set in and I’ll think something is wrong

I’m still ugly

Maybe I’m not ready now. I do know I want these things to happen

Don’t push up on me all these feelings

I hate feeling pressured.

I’m gonna make time to be loved.

I just can’t do it right now.

Yes you’ve caught my eye, that isn’t what you wanted though.

The laughs are great; energy is amazing

The secureness and safety I feel, unmeasurable.

Just don’t want it to be a facade.

But when I look into you, the genuine soul lights fuels you to be better.

I’ll see what happens. Control the destiny

Pt. 1

I remember I used to love.

Fast.

But you never doubted my heart

Caring.

Open.

Yours.

Now I swear it’s maximum security barricading.

Untrusting.

Tell me the days I used to have light in my eyes.

You.

Because there was that spark I once had helping me.

Shit.

What you mean I’m not good enough after all this time?

Who you telling that I won’t find someone like you?!

Duh.

That’s the whole idea to find better than the past.

Peace.

Don’t ever think my tears was for you.

Because.

You would never want them to be for you.

Bye.

3401 Bladensburg Rd

What a bad good time it was; seeing as though the meeting of occasion wasn’t what we expected.

Telling everyone a celebration is in order but only saw flowers and candles. Dressing the part but missing the time. When you were alive; where we knew love came from; how we grew up; what taught us right and wrong; why we never gave up; who seemed invincible.

The turn of events struck worse than wet metal on a string in a lightening storm. Although we were all together, we slowly drifted apart.

years go by and nothing is the same. tears turn into blood that eases the pain. heartbreak aint a thing, thats all in the past. my soul went away when she told me her last. “baby i love you, take care of ya momma”, so now i roll with her like 7/11 thunder. never really talked about this, as you can see. always kept this to myself between you and me.

i wish i could type the tears that fell on this paper. not sadness or anger coming from this.

Just happiness and bliss from everyone you miss.

Meditate and Wait

everything is fine; nothing is perfect

all the times I feel great; none of it lasts forever

to think of nothing to help understand everything

pause and reflect to resume and connect

I’ve learned to detach myself from my emotions

hoping to enjoy things better, without complications.

now wait…

dont doubt the possibilities

tell yourself to not go a mile a minute

living in past fears

because that cleanse was for a reason…

to make room for another moment.

 

It’s Always A Brighter Light When Things Are Too Dark

Feeling hopeless and not sure what to do next? Some days it can be hard to even get out of bed when it feels like there’s nothing we can do to make things better. But there are things we can do. Little steps we can take to help ourselves or someone we know.

Use Your Support Network: A support network doesn’t have to be an army of friends and family. It could be just one person who we can talk openly to about how we’re feeling. It helps to reach out to that person we can be honest with when things are overwhelming. For some of us, that person may be our counselor or doctor. The important part is that we aren’t holding it all in, that we’re talking about how we feel and that we’re letting someone help us.

Challenge Negative Thoughts: A big part of depression or anxiety is those thoughts in our heads that tell us things are bad, we are hopeless and that it won’t get better. The simple exercise of checking those thoughts and challenging them can do wonders for our state of mind. If the thought floats through your mind that things are never going to get better, remember a time when things were bad but did improve. This simple exercise can remind us that feelings generally do pass over time.

Take Care of Yourself: It sounds so simple, but little things like getting enough sleep and eating as healthy as possible can make a huge difference on how we feel emotionally. Lack of sleep can, in and of itself, cause problems with depression and anxiety. Also, exercising has been proven to significantly reduce symptoms of depression. So if you’re feeling down, stuck or overwhelmed, take a walk or head to the gym for a little while.

Use Moderation: We all know that drinking too much or abusing drugs can actually make us feel worse in the long run. Moderation is important when it comes to partying, but it’s also important in other aspects of our lives. If we’re feeling depressed or overwhelmed, we may have to say “no” to certain activities or opportunities. It’s more important to rest and take care of ourselves than it is to do everything.